Archetypes: The Sage.

Finally, we have reached the last Queen Archetype from the Mopop Queen Within exhibition! She is The Sage, and what a wonderful woman to finish with.

 She's the thinker, planner, risk-taker, and philosopher in all of us. She has wisdom, intelligence, and self-reflection and uses these powers to understand the world.

Her biggest fears are being ignored or tricked by others. This can lead to her weakness, which is the seductive lure of never-ending research.

The Sage cares about the environment and wants sustainable fabrics. Her clothing invites inquiry.

 What do you wear to invoke The Sage? What makes you feel wise and able to take risks?

Archetypes: The Enchantress

We are at our second-to-last archetype from the MoPop A Queen Within: Adorned Archetypes exhibition. This one is The Enchantress.

 She's the familiar seductress, vamp, and femme fatale (whose sexuality is defined in terms of her interactions with men) but also a sensualist and enthusiast. Her strengths are passion, wit, spiritual and bodily appeal. She mesmerizes but also can manipulate.

She wears clothes that entice. She is symbolized by her direct and sensual gaze, her loose hair or fabulous wigs, red lips, feathers, teeth, and flowers.

What are your favorite Enchantress outfits? What symbolizes women's sensuality to you?

Archetypes: The Explorer

In my June 26th blog post, I introduced us to the Museum of Pop Culture's Queen Within show. Today, we will explore the second archetype they discuss - the Explorer.

 She is a pioneer, adventurer, and a rebel. She's all over challenges and rejects authority. Her strengths are determination and independence, and her fears are conventionality, inner emptiness and boredom.

In this exhibit, the Explorer woman rebelled against the rigid framework of beauty and consumerism. She wore clothes that paid attention to issues of gender, race, and disability.

She is symbolized by the planets, the moon, the egg, the night, and the turtle.

What do you wear that expresses your inner Explorer? What makes you feel strong and determined?

Archetypes: The Heroine

I've  been talking about the brilliant Queen Within exhibit at MoPop in Seattle. (here)

The third Archetype we visited was The Heroine. She's a warrior and soldier. She's strongly moral and embraces challenges, especially the thrill of the chase. She's a hard worker, especially in her relationships, but can get addicted to emotional drama.

Her greatest fears are weakness, softness, and cowardice. Her tenacity, strength, and mental resolve are symbolized by the chess queen (the most powerful piece on the board), pearls, gloves, rare stones, the spear, the Mantua, and also body parts such as ears, eyes, and hands.

Feed your head! (apologies to Jefferson Airplane): The Thespian

Earlier this month, I went to the Museum of Pop Culture in Seattle, Washington. An amazing exhibit called A Queen Within: Adorned Archetypes completely blew my mind. It is an exhibition organized by Barrett Barrera Projects and curated by MUSEEA. You can see its Pinterest Board here.

I've discussed Archetypes before (see here, here, and here, for starters). Usually for women, our archetypes are tri-fold (Mother, Maiden, Crone), or limited in power (Waif, Seductress, Nurturer). The exhibit showed me new archetypes for my female characters.

I was so thrilled that I'm going to do a several part series on this show! Let's begin.

The first archetype we meet in the show is The Thespian. According to the words in the show, she is "an actress, entertainer, dramatist, or comedian. She loves to amuse others and enjoys the drama of life....Her greatest fear is to be constricted by routine, so she tends to dismiss the mundane aspects of life."

She is symbolized by extravagance and a vivid palette, as well as images of the earth, the labyrinth, the crane, the bear, water, greyhounds, peacocks, pelicans, and the phoenix.

Who do you know has aspects of the Thespian? What clothes do you own that makes you feel extravagant and vivid?

Viva Italy!

For the last two weeks, The Charming Man, the Flaming Chef, his husband Dr. Snickerdoodle, and I have been on vacation in...*drum roll*

Italy!

The Pantheon in Rome.

And it was cooler than even my deepest imagination.


We visited Florence, Rome, and Pompeii.

And over the next few weeks, I'm going to share some of the amazing photos we took there.

Like this one:

Fashion in Rome!

And this one, too.

Mosaics saved from the Baths of Caracalla

Let's go exploring the pleasures of this magical land!

Question of the Ages.

Today's topic:

Men's underwear.

The Seducer, by Gregg Homme

What is the sexiest to you?

Now these are some SHOES!

Vivienne Westwood Bondage Boots!

Advice to men, from a romance writer, Part Four

Of course, I have more personal pet peeves about male fashion.  It continues with my obsession with men's legs.

If you are wearing dark pants and dark shoes, please, please, PLEASE don't wear white socks. I hate to break the news, my sweet puddings, but it does not make you look like Michael Jackson when he was in his prime.

And this rule's corollary: No dark socks with sandals and shorts. Again, we're back to the stumpification of your sexy lower half.  Proportion remains the rule - you really don't want a torso that is two thirds of your body length.

The most important advice that I can give a man who is interested in a lady has nothing to do with clothes.
A poorly dressed man who understands the principle I'm about to reveal will have it all over a sharp dressed boor.

Here it is:

Look her in the eyes and let her finish her sentences.

In fact, I'll say it again, with a different font.

Look her in the eyes and let her finish her sentences. 

Nothing is more erotic, more sensual, more enticing to a woman than a man who genuinely listens to her concerns and ideas, and doesn't use them as a springboard for his own, much more important opinions.

This is what makes a romance hero so special. This is why women write and read romance - to find a man who values our intelligence even more than our bodies.

This is why I am giving you advice. Because I want you to be a sexy, awesome hero, too.

Advice to men, from a romance writer, Part Three

 It's very nice and all, but all we get is a nice view of your chin. And I'll be honest. Chins just don't rate as highly as eyes on the Sexy-o-Meter.

Another way to highlight your best features is to take off your baseball cap/trucker cap. If you are wearing one of these inside a building and especially on a date - take it off!

A man's eyes, eyelashes, lips, and smile are the prime attractors. A cap throws them into shadows, preventing soulful, sexy eye contact. You want people to see your eyes. WE want to see your eyes. And no, it doesn't matter if you are balding.

By all means, wear your cap if you are working outside in the sun. Once with a date, though, remove it. It makes you look courtly, stylish, and very, very classy. And what man doesn't want that?

Advice to men, from a romance writer, Part Two

Let's dive right into the important task of helping a man entice the kind of attention he would like. We'll start with clothing.

The point of clothing is to highlight your body's attractive parts and downplay what you are uncomfortable with. Every since fashion magazine, blog, and clothing store beats women over the head with this truth. For some reason, this rarely gets translated into action for men.

Let me give you an example.

I was sitting in a coffee shop when I drafted this post. A handsome young men came in to do some reading with his friends.

He had lovely curly blond hair and a wicked smile. He walked like a wrestler with a light and strong stride. But his pants bagged down past his mid-thighs. His hoodie drooped to past the waistband of his pants.

He didn't look sexy or interesting. The clothing made his body look deformed and disproportionate. The low pants and long jacket combined to make his torso appear to be three fourths of his body and shortened his legs into stubs.

It made me worry if he had been malnourished as an infant. This is not what you want someone thinking about when they look at you.

My very first advice is PULL UP YOUR PANTS and TUCK IN YOUR SHIRT.

Yes, I know this makes me sound like a grumpy old geezer. But go back to the basic principle of clothing- to highlight your best features and to downplay what makes you feel insecure.

Pulling up your pants will make you legs look long and strong. It'll show off your rear end and your package (and these views are a potent force for good in this universe! And who doesn't want to be a hero?). And it will put your body into proportion.

Many men who have bellies believe that a long shirt hanging down will disguise that flesh. But, remember, it merely stumpifies your legs! The long shirt is also likely to ride up, revealing what you are trying to hide. If you tuck in your shirt, it will make you look more together, more dressed, and will highlight your better parts.

Never fear! I have many more opinions on male attire and how to draw appreciative eyes. More tomorrow!

Advice to men, from a romance writer.

I'm a romance writer. This means I am a student of interactions between people- especially interactions that involve sexual or romantic tension.

Basically, the above is a nice way to say that I  spend a lot of time watching men.

While I'm watching men, I study their body language, the way they talk, the way they move, and how they present themselves.*

If it is true that men think of sex every seven seconds,  they certainly do not dress in a way that invites the female to think sexy thoughts about them. And forget getting them interested to approach the guy!

When I've been out and about, I've seen far too many heterosexual couples out on a date where the lady has put on a flattering outfit, worn stylish jewelry and pretty shoes, and applied makeup, while the gentleman (and I'm using the term loosely here) looks like he has just finished mowing the lawn in his flip flops, droopy shorts, and baseball cap.

Let me tell you that under these circumstances, the ladies never displayed any preening behaviors, or exhibited attraction in her body language. None of them were impressed.

For the next few days, I will present a romance writer's guide to male style. After all, I want to use you as inspiration for a romance hero!

*(If you are a guy and you see an extra-curvy, middle-aged [yet glamorous] woman staring at you, then taking notes, square your shoulders, spread your legs a little and give me a wink. I promise I'll blush).