Advice to men, from a romance writer.

I'm a romance writer. This means I am a student of interactions between people- especially interactions that involve sexual or romantic tension.

Basically, the above is a nice way to say that I  spend a lot of time watching men.

While I'm watching men, I study their body language, the way they talk, the way they move, and how they present themselves.*

If it is true that men think of sex every seven seconds,  they certainly do not dress in a way that invites the female to think sexy thoughts about them. And forget getting them interested to approach the guy!

When I've been out and about, I've seen far too many heterosexual couples out on a date where the lady has put on a flattering outfit, worn stylish jewelry and pretty shoes, and applied makeup, while the gentleman (and I'm using the term loosely here) looks like he has just finished mowing the lawn in his flip flops, droopy shorts, and baseball cap.

Let me tell you that under these circumstances, the ladies never displayed any preening behaviors, or exhibited attraction in her body language. None of them were impressed.

For the next few days, I will present a romance writer's guide to male style. After all, I want to use you as inspiration for a romance hero!

*(If you are a guy and you see an extra-curvy, middle-aged [yet glamorous] woman staring at you, then taking notes, square your shoulders, spread your legs a little and give me a wink. I promise I'll blush).

Writing exercises!

Every writer, pro or amateur, likes to play with ideas. Writing exercises such as writing to a timer, journaling, or engaging in microdescription (such as describing a single leaf on plant, etc.) can create huge amounts of joy and playfulness.

I found this writing exercise in my horoscope, of all places. Rob Breszny, author of the world's most delightful horoscopes, gave this as a prompt:

[An] exercise that's likely to energize you in just the right way is to picture yourself at age 77. I suggest you create a detailed vision of who you'll be at that time. See yourself drinking a cup of tea as you gaze out over a verdant valley on a sunny afternoon in June. What are you wearing? What kind of tea is it? What birds do you see? What are your favorite memories of the last 30 years?

Well! Who could resist such a delicious dream? Certainly not I! So I grabbed some paper and this is what I got.

I'm in the south of Spain, drinking peppermint tea with honey as I sit in a comfortable cushioned lounge chair. I'm wearing loose, cool pants and an ice-blue blouse that reveals my still magnificent bosom and nipped in waist. (Admitting my vanity is not comfortable for me. Oh, well. Might as well stay truthful, eh?)

I'm over looking the valley that leads to an open, golden beach below. The Charming Man and I are staying at a beautifully restored house with a lush, green garden. Hummingbirds and bees sing an early morning melody and share their amazing colors with the flowers and plants. The Charming Man is still asleep as I enjoy my tea and take notes for my next book.

I remember the first time I hit the Best Seller List. I enjoy knowing that I started scholarships for women who study history and that I support a non-profit that helps women start businesses.

I get up and do a few belly dance moves to express my happiness at reaching this moment in my life.

Now!

YOU tell me what you want to have happen when you are 77.