I can see clearly now, Part One.

I know this looks like a seductive gaze, but mostly I just couldn't see what was going on.

I've been asked to tell the story of my LASIK surgery. Here's the first part.

Ever since vision correction surgery became possible, I said I would never, never, ever do such a thing. I was happy with the correction that my contacts gave me and I didn't want some money grubbing knife jockey mucking about in my delicate eyes.

This was not some frivolous statement. I started wearing glasses around 1973 (second grade, if you must know) and got hard contacts in 1982. I *meant* it when I said, "No damn way in hell."

My Call to Adventure (remember that? It's the stimulus that takes a hero on her journey) was the oddest thought I'd ever had. I was washing my feet in the shower and I realized that I had no memory of ever seeing my feet in clear focus.

I knew I had to have seen my feet clearly at some point in my life. I was much shorter at one point, and my eyes had slowly degraded over the years. I had to have memories of what my feet looked like.

You know what pissed me off? That when women can't see their feet, they usually get a baby out of the deal. I was just freaking near sighted!

I wasn't about to live with this any longer. I didn't want to squint my life away. I didn't want to spend my days worrying about my contacts popping out.


I decided that I would investigate if I were a good candidate for eye surgery.

The joy of going to the library

I love checking books out from the library because that means I can test ride books that I otherwise would feel ambivalent about buying.

I picked up Thorn Queen by Richelle Mead, Book Two in the Dark Swan series.

I hadn't read any of her other books and picked up this one by chance. It's a good urban fantasy, complete with a love triangle, a morally compromised heroine torn between two legacies, betrayal, and some truly disturbing rape scenes.

I have mixed feelings about this book. It is very well written - fast-paced, complicated, great world building . She did a great job of telling me what happened in Book One so that I didn't feel left behind. The sex was hot, the men fascinating, the plot was twisty and dangerous.

I was highly disappointed by the climax, though.  Spoilers ahead, so stop reading here if you don't like that.

In Act Three, the heroine has been drugged, kidnapped, is held captive, and is repeatedly raped. (This is a very triggery section if you've dealt with rape or other kinds of sexual abuse). She rescues herself and the other captives (Yay!). The cavalry comes in the form of the two men vying for her affection and her step-father.

The rules in this world guarantee that the rapist cannot be brought to justice.  The men prevent her from killing her tormentor and argue between themselves about killing the criminal. Finally, one of her suitors shakes off the other men and kills the rapist.

This really annoyed me. Twenty five hundred years ago, Euripides wrote the play Medea.

Medea took her own revenge on her ex-husband Jason by murdering the woman he left her for, the girl's father, and the two children that she and Jason had together.This story is an unflinching look at women's capacity for finding her own justice.

The heroine in Thorn Queen had killed before. She was no innocent to be ruined by the shedding of blood. It would have been perfectly in character for her to engage in this final deed. I would have been fascinated to see the consequences of this act on her already compromised soul.

Why did the author shy away from letting the heroine decide the consequences  for the crimes committed to her own body? Why did a man have to act as her surrogate? Why did the men not understand her anger and hurt? What would be the price of becoming a Dark Queen?

These questions left me disappointed. I feel this was an amazing book that got frightened at the end. I look forward to seeing where Richelle Mead takes her books in the future.