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Saturday, September 10, 2011

Whose fantasies are they?

When I told my fellow writers that I was posting my characters' sexual fantasies, they said, "I can't believe you are sharing your sexual fantasies with the world!"

I was startled. These postings haven't been my fantasies. They are the heated imaginings of imaginary people.

"But doesn't that make them yours?" I can hear you asking. The answer is, not really. Oh, of course, every character a writer discovers has elements of that character inside of the. Like Sophia, I am very organized and often overwhelmed by the dominant personalities in my family of birth as well as in my family of choice. Like Celeste, I love flamboyant clothing and have trouble believing that people will help me. And for my delicious hero, Gabriel, I, too, am afraid of my temper. Like Zane, I have vast ambitions.

But they aren't all me. These characters also have elements of people I've met, other fictional characters I've read, and experiences I've heard from others.

For example, I have never fantasized about sex on a horse. (My poor back! The horse's poor back!) Then where did this idea come from?

Back in 1990, Laura Kinsale wrote her groundbreaking Prince of Midnight.  (Thank heavens it has been re-issued. Read it! It's brilliant)

The final love scene between Leigh (the heroine) and S.T. (the hero) is one of the most passionate, intimate love scenes I'd ever read. Let me repeat. This was in 1990. Over twenty years is a long time remember one love scene in one book that I read once.  I cannot forget the visuals of the sunlight in the riding ring where S.T. was practicing his horsemanship, how he coaxed Leigh onto the horse and onto his lap.

I will point out, I read a LOT.

The memory of that fictional encounter inspired me. Can *I* write a love scene worthy of the gifted Ms. Kinsale? Can I pull out the emotion, the passion, the emotional connection between those two very different people that Laura did? Can I express the pleasure that she so skillfully wrote?

Like I said. I have vast ambitions. If I'm going to challenge myself, I'm going to do it big.

Whose fantasies are they? I hope the ones I write will be yours, too.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Fantasies for all: Part four

One's most coveted 'secret material' is sure to portray the subjects most unspeakable tragedies and regrets. Sexual fantasies are the lemonade we made of the most bitter fruit. Susie Bright's Journal: What I Know About Osama Bin Laden's Porn Stash. May 26, 2011

When I explored my characters' sexual fantasies - the liaison du cheval, the group sex, the enthusiastic blowjob - I learned their deepest issues.

Celeste dreams of a family of lovers - so that she will "never go hungry again". After her beloved Henry died, she was agonizingly alone. Her family didn't think to give their independent aunt support, so she was desperate for touch, warmth, and comfort. If she were surrounded by others who love her, she would never be in that place again.

Gabriel believes a blowjob - not an unusual sexual act at all - could unseat his tight emotional control. He fears what would happen if he were to give himself over to pleasure, both on a psychic and physical level.

Sophia, my pretty librarian, was overwhelmed by her passionate, fiery family. Her appetites for attention and exotic sex reveals her need to make her own stamp on the world.

And I never would have known these things if I hadn't asked them what made them wet and hard.

What do your fantasies reveal about your bitter fruit?