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Showing posts with label Encouragement. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Encouragement. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 29, 2020

What is the best that could happen?

Let's be honest. Right now, the world truly sucks. We are dealing with a global pandemic, the rise of fascism, and incompetent world leaders. We are anxious, exhausted, and consumed with fear. In order to find at least a tiny bit of cope, we must ask ourselves:

WHAT IS THE BEST THAT CAN HAPPEN?

"Covid-19 numbers infection rates go down."

"Nationwide, all police departments destroy the traces of white supremacy that foul the system."



Then, we ask:
HOW DO WE MAKE THAT HAPPEN?

"I can continue to wear a mask and social distance. It's really hard, but I've done hard things before."

"I will write and call and protest to the best of my ability. It is scary and feels small, but it is less scary than doing nothing."



We cannot make the best happen if we do not know what it is.

Monday, August 29, 2016

Read this the next time you are desperately longing for encouragement:



Don’t let fear decide how you live, what you wear, what you say, or what you do.  Identify your fear, understand it and accept it, and move on.

Coco Graham


I believe reality is a marvelous joke staged for my edification and amusement, and everybody is working very hard to make me happy.

Terence McKenna

 

From Pure Joy springs all creation.
By Joy it is sustained, toward Joy it
proceeds and to Joy it returns.

From the Sanskrit.

Tuesday, August 9, 2016

How you can get out of your way and write already.

The Shanameh,the world's longest epic poem by a single author.

I meet many people who want to write. They yearn to express their thoughts, feelings, knowledge, and opinions. Yet, something holds them back. Here's a few ways to get out of your own way and write already.


  1.  Keep it secret, keep it safe.  Too many of us show our work to the wrong people, too soon. When your work is in a beginning place, it is like a delicate seedling. It needs encouragement (sunshine), kindness (water), and the proper nutrition (feedback). Your first draft is not the right time to show it to that certain someone whose respect you have been wishing for.  At first, treat your writing and dreaming like a precious, radical secret. Later on, when you become a sturdy tree, you can open it up for more critical input.
  2. Tell the truth. If someone had wanted you to write nice
    things about them, they would have behaved better. Naturally, change their details, change their names, change the planet, if you want, but those evil teachers, horrible bullies, and nasty parents are your characters. Use them.
  3. Lower the stakes. Don't try to write a book that people will study for the ages (for some reason, men get caught up in this trap more than women). Focus on getting words on paper by any means you need, like hand writing, keyboarding, or by making something up on your Facebook page during your break time. Make it fun, make it whimsical, make it crude, if that is your personality type.
  4. Fake yourself out. You don't need hours of uninterrupted time to write well. Set a timer for 9 or 13 or 20 minutes and write stuff down, even if it's, "I don't know what to say, I don't know what to say, I don't know what to say." 
  5. Surround yourself with other writers, especially fun, generous, and enthusiastic ones. Look for people who believe that a rising tide lifts all boats, who care about your success, and believe in celebrating all milestones, especially rejections. Do I even need to say that you need to be one of these people, too?
And when you are ready, edit the hell out of that manuscript and publish it!

***

Monday, May 2, 2016

What's sexy about men?

As a romance writer and healthy, red-blooded American woman, it is my fate, nay, my DUTY to identify what makes a guy yummy. Not just biological men, but trans men and every other man, too.

Eugene Jaques Bullard, a WWI pilot.
Of course, the whole 6-pack, big guns thing is super tasty, but I want to let men know that they can have a regular guy body and still rock that sex appeal.

1. Pride
Not the deadly sin sort, but the kind that lets another person know that you can overcome adversity and have learned competence. A competent man is a sexy man.

An unidentified Australian WWI soldier
2. Expressive eyes.
I love looking at this photo of this soldier. I see someone who would be willing to tell what he has lived through.





3. Forearms.
 



Yes, I know Jeremy Renner is not a normal sort of guy, but bear (bare! Bare arms! Ha!) with me.

Not every guy has big biceps. But forearms are the Every Man's sexy body part. You don't have to wear tee-shirts, just find a shirt with sleeves and roll those suckers up. It's a good look on *everyone*.



4. Bondage.
 Seriously. Every man looks good in bondage.


Or maybe that's just me....

Nah. 

Monday, January 12, 2015

Blast from the Past: Playing with the Tarot

Back on December 12 of 2013, I did a cool blog post about creating my mission statement. And I liked this post so much, I thought I'd re-run it!
*****




 There is something about the winter season that makes me want to hermit up. I decided I might as well roll with it, so this morning, I did a  Tarot spread.

 My deck is the Visconti-Sforza deck, a 15th century deck, and one that I find the most beautiful.

I'm not a big Tarot chick - I find it a fun way to play with brainstorming, dream up psychological insights, and of course, work on archetypes. 

I found a spread called Create a Vision Statement in Barbara Moore's book, Tarot Spreads.
Super fun!
The spread looks like this: 
2     3
   1
4     5
Position One is who you are, Two is what you do, Three is how you do it, Four is who you do it for, and Five is the benefits to your clients/audience. 
And this is my very cool mission statement!
I discover and bring to life bold stories of adventure and passion for lovers and dreamers so we can create options for a better world. 
 *happy dances*
What is *your* mission statement?
(I drew the Eight of Wands, the Knight of Wands, the King of Wands, Two of Cups, and the Nine of Cups, if you are curious)l

Friday, January 31, 2014

Hafiz break!

I'm a big fan of Hafiz (or Hafez), a Persian poet who lived 1325-1389 CE.

Sometimes, when I am completely stressed out, I open a book of his poems and read. I always come away refreshed and enlightened.

Here is one for you today, translated and re-imagined by Daniel Ladinsky, called I Know the Way You Can Get.

I know the way you can get
When you have not had a drink of love:

Your face hardens,
Your sweet muscles cramp.
Children become concerned
About a strange look that appears in your eyes
Which even begins to worry your own mirror
And nose.

Squirrels and birds sense your sadness
And call an important conference in a tall tree.
They decide which secret code to cahng
To help your mind and soul.

Even angels fear that brand of madness
That arrays itself against the world
Tomb of Hafiz in Shiraz.
And throws sharp stones and spears into
That innocent
And into one's self.

O I know the way you can get
If you have not been out drinking Love:

You might rip apart
Every sentence your friends and teachers say,
Looking for hidden clauses.

You might weigh every word on a scale
Like a dead fish.
You might pull out a ruler to measure
From every angle in your darkness
The beautiful dimensions of a heart you once
Trusted.

I know the way you can get
If you have not had a drink from Love's
Hands.


That is why all the Great Ones speak of
The vital need
To keep Remembering God,
So you will come to know and see Him
As being so playful
and Wanting.
Just Wanting to help.

That is why Hafiz says:
Bring your cup near me,
For I am a Sweet Old Vagabond
With an Infinite Leaking Barral
Of Light and Laughter and Truth
That the Beloved has tied to my back.

Dear one,
Indeed, please bring your heart near me.
For all I care about is quenching your thirst for freedom!

All a Sane man can ever care about
Is giving Love!






Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Rewriting the past.

I recently read this question and it started a flood of thoughts.

So I thought I'd share the pain!

If you could sit down with your 15-year old self, what would you say?

I think I'd say, "You are going to live, live, LIVE like you want. You rock!"

And you?

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Playing with the Tarot

*blows dust off of blog* *cough choke*


Sorry it's been so long, everyone. There is something about the winter season that makes me want to hermit up. I decided I might as well roll with it, so this morning, I did a cool Tarot spread.

 My deck is the Visconti-Sforza deck, a 15th century deck, and one that I find the most beautiful.

I'm not a big Tarot chick - I find it a fun way to play with brainstorming, dream up psychological insights, and of course, work on archetypes. 

I found a spread called Create a Vision Statement in Barbara Moore's book, Tarot Spreads.
Super fun!

The spread looks like this: 

2     3
   1
4     5

Position One is who you are, Two is what you do, Three is how you do it, Four is who you do it for, and Five is the benefits to your clients/audience. 

And this is my very cool mission statement!

I discover and bring to life bold stories of adventure and passion for lovers and dreamers so we can create options for a better world. 

 *happy dances*

What is *your* mission statement?


(I drew the Eight of Wands, the Knight of Wands, the King of Wands, Two of Cups, and the Nine of Cups, if you are curious)l

Saturday, November 23, 2013

Friday, June 14, 2013

Kicking my own butt.

I always try to find cool music to lift me up and get my booty shaking in my chair. Here's my latest obsession:


(link to video HERE if it doesn't show up)

This song makes me not hate bagpipes!

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Greatest Hits

Jane with Heather Locklear.
Once again, it is time to get into the Way Back Machine and discover what exactly is hidden in my blog's archives.


Published January 7, 2010, here is a writing game courtesy of Jane Porter.

***
Several years ago, Jane Porter spoke at my local RWA chapter, the Rose City Romance Writers.

I'll be honest. Jane's blonde, gorgeous, petite, skinny, and looks about sixteen. I was consumed by envy. Then she gave a brilliantly inspirational speech about where your writing fits in the market.

I was expecting something very business-like, maybe a breakdown of the different publishers and what they tended towards.

Instead, she talked about the roots of your writing- the fables, myths, and fairy tales that consumed you as a child. What could you listen to over and over? What were those themes? What keeps coming up over and over for you?

The fairy tales didn't reveal that much about me, I thought. I picked.
  1. The Seven Swans: I chose discipline, faithfulness, and sewing shirts out of flowers (transformation) as the themes I loved about this story.

  2. Aladdin : Flying, courage, and risk.

  3. Sleeping Beauty: Disguises, awakening to a new reality, and (what the hell) fairies with personalities.
I really flailed with these. No common themes seemed to emerge. Then we went to mythology. I chose:

  1. Medea: Revenge, justifiable wrath, a woman who controls her life, a woman who kills, escape


  2. The Golden Fleece: Powerful allies, justifiable wrath, travel


  3. The Aenead: Rising from the ashes, travel, new starts
I suddenly realized why my attempts at light-hearted romantic comedy failed miserably. I had much darker stories inside of me.

I focused on the story that began, "She swam in an ocean of blood" instead of "Lola blinked." I'm pretty sure we can all tell which first sentence is far more attention grabbing. :)
(That's not the first sentence anymore, by the way ;).

Myths, fables, legends, and fairy tales are our playground. They provide the archetypes, the symbols, and the language for our lives.

Play the game with me. What are the stories that have haunted you? What themes do you carry inside of yourself?

Friday, March 29, 2013

Best of...

For my retrospective, here is a blog post from November 22, 2009. Enjoy!

***

No fear?

A dear friend of mine has characters and stories roaming her head. She wants, no, yearns to write.

Just like the rest of us, she is frightened.

Writing is scary stuff. Let's list a few of the things that scare her.

  1. Rejection by publishers.
  2. Rejection by agents.
  3. Rejection by friends and family.
  4. The possibility that you really DO suck.
  5. The possibility that you might learn something about yourself that you didn't want to know. (I was pretty surprised that I wrote vampire stories. I wanted to write screw-ball comedies).
  6. Bad reviews.
  7. Good reviews.
  8. Not getting published which leads to...
  9. Feeling like you've wasted your time.
  10. Not making money.
These fears are real. They stop people in their tracks every day. They even stop me from time to time.

I have no easy answers about how to not be afraid. In fact, these fears are important. You have to look at them and say, "Well. What if I do suck? What if my work does gets rejected from now until the end of time?"

The payoff might not be worth the pain. If so, then congratulate yourself, and realize that there are many other dreams waiting for you! Maybe you will find fulfillment in improv comedy or Linux open-source work.

Make your fears work for you.

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Working for a living: Women in the Arts, II

Today's guest is Grace Constantine, dancer, author, landscape architect, and all around amazing person. Please welcome Grace!

1.What is the name of your business and what do you tell other people you do? 
(such as author, teacher, designer)

I'm Grace Constantine, belly dance performer and teacher, and director of 
theatrical fusion troupe Deviant Dance Company.

2.When did you know it was time to stop treating your art as a hobby and start 
it as a career?

I have no idea, I just woke up one day and I was a belly dancer! For me there 
has not been much of a difference between hobby and career. Dance has always 
been more than a hobby to me, it has been a deeply important part of my spirit 
since I was a child, and even as a hobbyist I approached my projects with a 
professional level of care. Early on, I made the conscious decision not to 
pursue a living with this artform. I did not want my creative process to be 
affected by the need to support myself on a daily basis--essentially, I wanted 
my life in dance to be pure joy, to remain unsullied by monetary concern. 
However, my interest and passion has only grown as years have gone by; 
eventually I spent so much time and energy that I suppose a career became 
inevitable, and so here I am.

3.What are some of the aspects of your job that people don’t see? For example, 
most people don’t understand how much marketing is done by the authors 
themselves instead of a publisher, and most audience members don’t see how 
costumes and props are designed/chosen.

Probably most folks have no understanding of how much time in the weeks or 
months before an event goes into working out logistics with event promoters, 
venues, musicians, lighting, staging, etc. to make sure that everything comes 
together for the audience. I spend a good deal of time every day communicating 
about these things. Every event is unique, and many have very different needs. I 
often work with live musicians, and this adds another needed element of 
communication. Many events have a theme, or a specific audience that requires a 
certain type of performance. Behind-the-scenes concerns also include marketing, 
rehearsal scheduling and arrangements, travel plans for out-of-town events, and 
negotiating contracts. This is all before I get to create lesson plans and 
workshop content; train in the studio; teach classes; and finally design 
performances. Phew!

4.Who inspired/inspires you on those inevitable rough days?

My brilliant students: every time they encounter something new and pick it up as 
if they've always known it, it inspires and re-ignites me! My endlessly talented 
troupemates: they always say 'yes' to my crazy schemes, and then build on them! 
My darling husband: he is always ready with a hug, and makes sure that I eat 
good food, even when I am obsessed with a project!

5.Name a few of your current projects. For example, conferences, publicity, 
design process, what you have for sale.

This month I taught and performed at Columbia University's Middle Eastern Dance Conference--talk about inspiring! My troupe Deviant Dance Company recently added a new member, and we are creating a new piece called 'Song of the Tentacle' to be released in February. Also in February I will be sharing the stage with the Bellydance Superstars when they come to Seattle. I am writing a regular column on the creative process for the new belly dance magazine 'From the Hip', and I am enjoying writing very much. As always, I am teaching a full complement of one-on-one lessons, and planning workshops for the new year.

6. (OPTIONAL)This question is a chance to meander or talk in greater depth if 
you’d like. Here you can talk about what hobbies you pursue, how you refresh 
your well of ideas, what you would recommend to other women interested in a 
career in the arts, or just anything you'd like other people to know.

Advice to women interested in a career in the arts: don't do what everybody else 
is doing. Play! Experiment to find out what you are good at and what you enjoy, 
and explore those things deeply. This is how you will find your strength.

Grace Constantine
www.graceconstantine.com 
www.facebook.com/constantine.grace 

NEWS:
--Latest performance video--Grace at Salon L'Orient 2012:
http://youtu.be/uORzw7QUi58 


--Grace is a staff writer for the brand new 'From the Hip' Magazine!
www.newsfromthehip.com 


Monday, October 29, 2012

And the winner is....

Many thanks go to Beth Gordon of Oregon, a super-fantastic person who shared the news of my latest blog giveaway!

Beth receives this wonderful dragon necklace for spreading the word. :)

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Dracula's Desires: Taste the desire.

To celebrate the release of Dracula's Desires, I'm going to release little snippets of the first two chapters here at my blog.

Introduction
On a wild, evil night in 1431 AD, Vlad II Dracul’s second son was born. The parents named their child Vlad III, after his father. This child grew up to become one of the most famous torturers in the world: Vlad the Impaler, Vlad Tepes, best known as Dracula. The stories of his atrocities grew even greater when he refused death and became the legendary vampire.


     Throughout the centuries, the younger Vlad allied himself with leaders who promised an orderly, centralized government that would control an unruly, chaotic Europe. His goal came to the end when he died in Berlin, another dupe used by Hitler to achieve his crazed goals.

The problem with once-upon-a-time stories? They get the important things wrong.





Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Check out me, hitting the Big Time!


The cover of Dracula's Secret made it into an article in the June 4th, 2012 issue of Publisher's Weekly!!

It's a thumbnail on the first page of an article on the resurgence of contemporary romances. I am attempting to remain calm.

But failing.

 Let's take another look at that thumbnail. :)
Sorry about the fuzzy quality - I took an iPhone picture of the library's copy to hold me over until the bookstores get their copies in.

Sunday, February 26, 2012

Try, try again.

Yesterday was a low output day - only 5 pages out of my goal of 12. That said, I did some very good work on moving things around and making the flow better.

Today is day five of my ten day marathon. Let's see where it goes today.

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Go, go, go!

I have to write 120 pages before March 2nd. My goal is 12 pages a day.

And I have reached my goal for today! Woohoo!

I'm going to keep a running total here on my blog so I can track my progress. :)

The trick to this kind of long haul is to take several breaks for yoga, meditation, hot baths, and Elvis' 1968 Comeback special.